Fashion Advice from Someone Without Style
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I am the first to admit that I am not fashionable at all. Facebook has an application where you rank your “friends” in certain categories and I was voted least fashionable and least trustworthy. Thanks Assholes!

Anyways, I have been noticing some things that people wear that irk the living hell out of me.

pongo

I really do need a stylist

1) Ed Hardy Hats and Shirts

Let me give you a little history lesson about how this brand came about. So one day this trucker hat wearing douchebag started ingesting some shrooms. He then reached for some skittles because he was hungry. As he is looking the plethora of colors, he realized that if he puts the skittles on his Von Dutch Hat then, throw on some buttons and maybe some glitter it would be cool. Then the d-bag decided to charge $80 per hat.

edhardyItem contains Buttons, Glitter, Skittles, and Unicorn Tears.

He then targeted 2 very affluent communities (The Persians and Korean Fobs).

Guess what? If you go to Ktown you will see at least 10 Ed Hardy hats. And I guaruntee you 8 of the 10 people wearing those hats are fobs. I don’t have a problem with persians or Korean fobs. I have a huge problem with those hats though.

Then they decided to to make shirts, jackets, shoes, etc. So now not only do I see hideous hats around. I see people decked in this shit from head to toe. It looks like a rainbow got raped. Word of advice to the people that wear this shit. Pick 2-3 colors and stick with it. Nothing Bedazzled either. You guys are so colorful I can see you from google maps. Its really bad.

2) Sunglasses at Night

Unless you are Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder, or Jack Nicholson, you are not allowed to wear glasses at night. Actually, anyone with creepy lazy eyes can wear them at night. That is why Musiq Soulchild wears sunglasses all the time. He got a crazy eyes.  Trust me…

Anyways, don’t wear glasses at night. If you do decide to wear sunglasses at night you better be performing on stage or it better be a costume. If not please go run into a tree.

There are a lot more things that bug me about fashion but I forgot to bring my laptop charger.

I have a show coming up in a couple of weeks so come thru!

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Oh and a reminder, the end of the month is coming up soon! Free DVD’s will be given away so leave them comments putos!

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