Posted November 18th, 2011 by

For quite some time, I was trying to perform for the troops. I have had friends fight in the middle east and everytime I talk to them, they always mentioned how it would be cool for me to go out there and perform so that atleast for that amount of time, they don’t think about the fact that someone is trying to kill them every day.

Whether or not I agree with the US military presence in the middle east and in other parts of the world, these men and women are risking their lives for us. And for that I am grateful and all of you should be too. If not, go fall on a rusty nail you selfish apathetic shit vessel.

Anyways, my manager informed me a few months ago that he got me 13 gigs on various Army posts across the country. I was stoked at the opportunity to perform. I quickly realized that this tour was going to be pretty rough.  If you are not aware, a lot of the bases are in the middle of nowhere and they are a pain in the ass to get to.

It was an interesting experience since I was on the road with comics I have never met. Cerrome Russell and A Pair of Nuts (Yamil Piedra and Johnny Trabanco). A lot of times all comics talk about are bits that they do or how shitty their careers are. Trust me after a few hours of this it gets fucking annoying. However, these guys weren’t like that at all. They were fucking cool. Sure there were some posts that needed to up their hospitality game but all in all the tour was very memorable.

From shitty 8 seat planes where I thought I was gonna die for sure. To haunted hacienda rooms, to shitting on the same toilet as Gen. Patton and President/Gen. Eisenhower. That’s right at one post, we got to stay where distinguished Generals stayed in. How many of yall can say you shat on the same toilet as a former president? That’s what I thought muthafackas. Ya boy is big time.

I had a lot of fun and here are some pictures from the road:


I was awarded a coin from the Fort Sill, OK. Unfortunately this was the only coin I received.

Sometimes trailers don’t make you feel baller. This was set up as our greenroom.

If I had this growing up no one would fuck with me. 

I was told my room was haunted. I aint scared of ghosts!

But I saw this outside my room and this scared the shit out of me…

This is the church van with wings. I helped fly this thing to St. Louis. The other passengers are retarded for letting me sit co-pilot.

My name is lights. So are A Pair of Nuts, but what about Cerrome? Definitely a tour of Disrespect going on.

Cerrome and I letting people know we about to get foolish on stage.

The mansion we stayed in. Former residents include: General Patton and President Eisenhower.

After the final show at Joint Base Lewis McChord. (Yamil, Me, Cerrome, Johnny)

Thank you to all the men and women who serve in the military. God bless yall and please come home safely.