Thought of the Day…

This is a little different from my usually crass posts about shitty sex exploits or fucked up situations. Its been a few months since I got back from Korea. Something hit me like a ton a bricks when I was out there.

Someone said to me “You must be loving life man. You are getting paid to travel and do what you love to do.”

I replied “ Yea man. It’s been a dream.”

But the more and more I thought about it. I realized I wasn’t loving life. When I was working the stupid hours at KPMG I thought how awesome it would be to make a living doing what I love to do. Don’t get me wrong, I love what I do for a living. The creating, the performing, etc. However, I realized that now that I am finally getting by doing whatever the fuck I do, I sat and really thought if I was happy.

Then in Korea, I randomly met a someone that was in the entertainment business there many years ago. His group was at one point was at the top of the music charts and what not. We ended up drinking for a while that night just shooting the shit in the rain. As I got a little tipsy, I told him about my concerns. He looked at me and he told me this.

“when I was younger I thought that doing what I loved to do would make me happy. When (name of his group) was on top of the charts, I was happy about the success but I realized that it came a cost. I neglected to cultivate other aspects that keep me going.”

He went on to say that he realized that he started losing contact with friends and family and it really put him in a funk. He no longer is really in the entertainment industry like he once was but he seems to have found the right balance that works for him.

So how does it all relate to me? Well I realized that I too have neglected close friends and family in the last few years. Sure they are busy with their lives too but I realized that I haven’t been a good friend, brother, or son.  When shit hits the fan, I know that my good friends will always be there to help me out.  Without a doubt I am sure that they all have my back. However, sometimes you feel like shit when you realize that you haven’t seen em or talked to them in more than a year.

I want to clarify. Just because we hang out often and have a drink every now again don’t me friendship to me. Let’s get it straight. Those people are just acquaintances. Real friends are people you are truly selfless for and hopefully they feel the same way. Friends aren’t made because of convenience but because of a bond that can’t be explained by situations and examples. Rather, its just there.

I guess the point of all of this is to all my close friends who will get a chance to read this, I will try my best to do better. I trust that you guys will try to keep me accountable in my actions. Thanks for you time.