Sometimes I get caught up with all of life’s stupidity that I lose focus of my loved ones. The ones I tend to forget and neglect the most are my family. But recently I rewatched this video:
It put me in a weird mood. A part of me was truly moved by such unconditional love. A love that only parents have for their children. I have caused quite a few heartaches for my mom and dad. The most recent one being my transition to becoming a fulltime comedian and actor. They weren’t so happy about my move. For those that don’t know, I used to work as a Valuation Consultant at KPMG. I made pretty decent money and really didn’t stress about bills etc. I actually learned a lot and enjoyed my time there. However, at the same time, I started getting more gigs in the entertainment business. From stand up to my stuff at Mad TV and some commercials. It just made it impossible for me to continue doing both the consulting gig and the entertainment stuff.
I decided that I need to scratch this itch and quit my good paying job and instantly dropped a few levels in the income bracket. The first month after quitting, I made $65!!!
My parents were obviously not happy with the move. You see they came to this country and worked their asses off (they still do) to make sure that my sister and I wouldnt have to struggle like them. They sacrifice everything for my sister and me. That is why even though it is a bit sad that they dont approve in what I do, I understand that it is because they want what is best for me in their eyes.
And even though they dont like what I do, my parents at this point still try to be as supportive as they can. That is unconditional love right there. Even though, I am a fuck up at times, they are still right there for me. For that I am eternally grateful.
My dad is 6’1 and my mom is 4’8. Add that up and divide it by 2, you get my height.
Message to Parents:
I know that you come to this site sometimes and don’t know what I am writing. I wanted to say THANK YOU for being who you are. Sure we have our disagreements and you disapprove of a lot of things about me. Seeing you work so hard even til this day really inspires me. APPA, you taught me to never give up. As you liked to say ” When a man draws his sword, he should always draw blood.” I struggle with it but I try emulate your work ethic. Umma, I am sorry for not being a better son. You always told me that when Halmoni died you wished you were a better daughter to her. I know I dont show it but I always think of you guys as much as possible.
To My Sister:
Grace, I doubt you will read this but I wanted to say Sorry for not being a better older brother to you. I know it must have been tough to be my little sister. The pressure, the expectations. I am proud of the adult you have become and I will try to be there more.
Message to my Readers:
Take care of your loved ones. Family is all you got sometimes.
I am the first to admit that I am not fashionable at all. Facebook has an application where you rank your “friends” in certain categories and I was voted least fashionable and least trustworthy. Thanks Assholes!
Anyways, I have been noticing some things that people wear that irk the living hell out of me.
I really do need a stylist
1) Ed Hardy Hats and Shirts
Let me give you a little history lesson about how this brand came about. So one day this trucker hat wearing douchebag started ingesting some shrooms. He then reached for some skittles because he was hungry. As he is looking the plethora of colors, he realized that if he puts the skittles on his Von Dutch Hat then, throw on some buttons and maybe some glitter it would be cool. Then the d-bag decided to charge $80 per hat.
Item contains Buttons, Glitter, Skittles, and Unicorn Tears.
He then targeted 2 very affluent communities (The Persians and Korean Fobs).
Guess what? If you go to Ktown you will see at least 10 Ed Hardy hats. And I guaruntee you 8 of the 10 people wearing those hats are fobs. I don’t have a problem with persians or Korean fobs. I have a huge problem with those hats though.
Then they decided to to make shirts, jackets, shoes, etc. So now not only do I see hideous hats around. I see people decked in this shit from head to toe. It looks like a rainbow got raped. Word of advice to the people that wear this shit. Pick 2-3 colors and stick with it. Nothing Bedazzled either. You guys are so colorful I can see you from google maps. Its really bad.
2) Sunglasses at Night
Unless you are Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder, or Jack Nicholson, you are not allowed to wear glasses at night. Actually, anyone with creepy lazy eyes can wear them at night. That is why Musiq Soulchild wears sunglasses all the time. He got a crazy eyes. Trust me…
Anyways, don’t wear glasses at night. If you do decide to wear sunglasses at night you better be performing on stage or it better be a costume. If not please go run into a tree.
There are a lot more things that bug me about fashion but I forgot to bring my laptop charger.
I have a show coming up in a couple of weeks so come thru!
Oh and a reminder, the end of the month is coming up soon! Free DVD’s will be given away so leave them comments putos!
A couple days ago we had FR*A Live show called Talkin Ish.
It was a fun show. Dumbfoundead is a dope MC that has been hustling at his craft for quite a while now. Almost a decade! So the show went pretty smooth. The chat rooms were buzzin with questions for Dumbfounded and hard core fans. I guess the thing that amused me the most but none of the viewers had the chance to see was this one girl that personal messaged us during the chat.
She asks us during the middle of the taping if we can do anything fun. She said that she was bored of the show. I asked her what she would like to see. She responds by saying something like, “I dunno, dance or something.” I replied instead of dancing like a clown how about she just not watch then. I guess she was taken aback by my rude reply. She asked “Isn’t that bad for business?” I responded by stating that I aint getting paid for this and its just something that me and my friends are doing. I guess she liked someone on the broadcast so she stayed for the whole hour show. Good for her!
Shout outs to Dumbfoundead for being a dope guest. Shout outs to FR*A for letting us mess around in their office. Shout outs to Grinch and IZreal for being dope hosts. But I am still the best host in the business. Thanks!
In case you missed it, here is the show:
Recently, my buddy Paul Sun(The Social Trust) agreed to take some photos of me. I figured I needed new headshots and its always good to have pics of this sexy mug. Here are some of the pics:
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Upon Looking at these pictures, I got completely depressed. For those that dont know me that well, I used to be pretty fit. I wasn’t this fat always. (Damn, I feel like a woman right now!) Anyways here is a pic of me during my skinny years:
Damn thats a good looking kick! Tell me what picture you like!
Oh and remember to keep the comments coming. The month is coming to an end!
Being an Asian American and being a comedian makes me a member of this group. I have a lot to say about what problems people in this group face. So here it goes:
1) Hate from our own people.
I guess Margaret Cho would be the perfect example for this. Even til this day, Margaret doesn’t get that much love from her own people. I honestly cant narrow down the reasons for this. Maybe its her raunchy material, Maybe its her failed TV work, maybe its her tats. The fact of the matter is she does not get much support from asian america.
(She is Wang Noona of Asian American Comedians. Much Respect!)
It really saddens me to see this because you can be a fan of her work or not, but there is no doubt she is one of the first Asians in this country to get her hour comedy special and travel the country. She is truly a pioneer and I for one am a fan of all that work and hustle. Without her there would be no way for any of the asian american comedians to be where they are at now.
Daniel Dae Kim is another example of this. When Lost first came out, people didn’t celebrate the fact that an Asian American was on a hit prime time show. Rather, there were a lot of Koreans talking shit about how his korean was terrible on the show. I have heard with my own ears people saying he was a loser. Really? I wish that people understand that this business is not that easy. It is one of the hardest fields to break into and maintain. A lot of us are doing what we love to do, while most of the haters are probably stuck in a shitty job just trying to make the bills. Look, there is nothing wrong with you doing work. But it is a problem to me when you are selling cell phones or working as a receptionist at a law firm and you shitting on us. I am quite certain your dream job is not to answer phone calls and file paper work. So relax and celebrate the fact that some of us are on TV and movies.
(Good Korean or Not you are damn Sexy holmes!)
2) Lack of Support
Entertainment is a passion for us but it is also a business. Comedians don’t get gigs at theaters just because they are funny. They get booked because they put asses in seats. Same goes from musicians and actors. Movies are a business. So or tv shows. Sure you may think you rather not spend the 20 dollar cover at a comedy club or the 10 dollars at a movie theater on opening weekend, but if asian americans comedians dont fill comedy clubs, theaters, and arenas then we will never get big. Sure there are avenues that even without a big initial fan base people can reach some sort of fame, but that is nearly impossible. This blog is not meant for me to ask you guys to come to every one of my shows. I can really care less if you do or not. But I just want to explain that if some of you really want to see asians do it big in all aspects of this business then yall need to support. There are people already out there making it without the help of asians.
Ken Jeong, has been in many movies in the last couple of years. I have met Ken many times and he is so deserving of all his success. Sure you can talk about his cock size in Hangover but he is truly doing it big. Big shout outs to my man Ken Jeong. He is in a new movie coming out with Jeremy Piven soon. So check that shit out.
(Ken you are one of the funniest fuckers out there!)
Also if you want to show asian pride, how about not just showing up for the World Baseball Classic or the World Cup. Show up on opening weekend if someone asian american has a big role. Show up to comedy shows when some asian american comic is on the bill. Go tell your local radio stations to play some tracks from your favorite asian american musicians.
3) Loosen the Fuck up.
Most of the hate mail I get is from Asian Americans. They believe that I am not setting a good example for the next generation of kids out there. I dont tell jokes wondering if I am setting a good example. Really, the only people setting good examples for children should be their parents. Fucking raise them right. Every “raunchy, racy” joke I tell, I will have asian americans cringing and some are compelled to write me emails saying I should be ashamed of myself. Most of my material are true stories that I have experienced. Yes, I have been to a shady massage place. Yes, I drunkenly pissed on a bum. Yes, I have pulled out anal beads out of a chick and she shat. I am actually not creative enough to come up with shit, I just like retelling stories of my life and situations i have been. I am just keeping it as real as possible.
Asians have been bitching a lot about things. Like the Miley Cyrus “chink eye” picture to Abercrombie’s shirt that said “2 wongs dont make a white” Some things are racist in my eyes but the shit above really didnt bug me. Honestly, I was kinda annoyed that people were so pissed off about that. The Tsunami song was fucked up. But the Miley Cyrus thing wasnt bad. Pau Gasol’s picture for the Spanish Basketball team wasnt fucked up. Really, pick your battles or we will just look like whiney bitches.
(Message to Asian Dude in the the picture. Please go punch everyone in the picture and then punch yourself. Thanks!)
I am sure some of you were looking for funny in this post and I apologize. I am currently at a cafe in Koreatown and when I went to take a piss, the toilet already had some other dude’s shit nuggets. Learn how to flush you fucker! Sorry I was upset and I had a brain fart.
I have been doing a decent amount of interviews and people usually ask me who are my inspirations in stand up comedy. Usually, I just rattle off the answers without much thought but today I started really thinking about it and here are the people that in some way shape or form got me to where I am in the comedy business.
1) Bernie Mac
I saw Bernie Mac on the Def Comedy Jam serious when I was a kid. I was just buggin out because half the time I didn’t know what the hell he was saying. But it was his swagger and confidence that really impressed me. There is a story about his first def comedy jam appearance. So the guy before Bernie Mac was totally bombing and if you dont know how a black crowd acts then watch Showtime at the Apollo. They will boo the living hell out of you. I have been booed by an all black audience once. It sucked! Anyways, no one knew who Bernie Mac was. He was pretty known in his hometown of Chicago but in NYC he was relativelt unknown. So since the guy before him bombed, the crowd was getting restless. Bernie Mac comes on the stage and says ” I aint scared of you muthafuckas! DJ Kick It!” That is some nutty shit! Here is pure Bernie Mac goodness. REST IN PEACE!
2) Dave Chappelle
Dave Chappelle was one of the main reasons I wanted to do stand up comedy. In the beginning of college, my buddies taped a copy of Dave Chappelle’s Killing them Softly. Sure I saw Dave on def comedy jam and everyone knows him from Half Baked but I never really saw a set like Daves. It was so good to me because it had so many layers of funny. That is what I think sets apart Dave Chappelle from a lot of comedians. He can tell a story that not only is funny on the surface but it has social commentary in it.
The personal story of Dave I have is quite random. I was filling in as a host at the Laugh Factory. This was when Dave went to Africa and everyone was saying he was crazy. Anyways, I am on stage doing a little stand up. Now I was at the Laugh Factory everyweek at that point and I was doing pretty well. I thought I was pretty damn good. Anyways, the manager of the club comes running in and she is motioning for me to get off stage. I was thinking what in the hell is she is doing. She motions to the back and I saw Dave Chappelle and he wanted to get on stage. If you don’t know about the comedy business, if a star like Chappelle makes an unannounced set, he going on stage. No time limit as well. Anyways, when I bring up Dave Chappelle, the whole place shook. It was nutty. He got on stage and did a 40 minute set. I was completely humbled. He KILLED! After the set, we chatted for a while and he imparted a lot of good advice to me about this business. He is a good dude.
3)PK
A lot of you know PK as the founder of Kollaboration. They started off a small talent show to something really huge now. PK was been a big reason I have been in the stand up comedy. I met PK when I was in college. I was Junior at UCLA and I was at a banquet. He was running a little late, and they asked me to fill in. He saw me perform for a little bit and we talked. At the time, he was hosting Asian Night at the Laugh Factory. He did that for 3 years. Crazy talk! Anyways, PK got me much stage time. From gigs at the Laugh Factory to gigs at Kollaboration. He also encouraged me to do stand up full time. So Mom and Dad, you know who to blame.
PK’s passion for empowering asians and his work ethic is something that all people need to learn from. Check out his websites:
4) Bobby Lee
Bobby Lee is a very influential to me. I met him when I competed in Kollaboration. Bobby asked for my number and he called me. He said he needed someone fat and retarded looking for a sketch on MadTV. That sketch turned out to be more than a one time thing. Because of him, I have been on MadTV for about 10 episodes. He also got me my first commercial agent. You can say what you want about Bobby but outside of Margaret Cho, he has been in the limelight for a long time. He is truly a hall of famer in my book.
Once again, this is my list of people that have somehow affected me and inspired me to be where I am. Remember, to leave your comments for you chances to win my dvd for free!
