For most of the month of July, I was doing a DVD giveaway contest. My assistant and I looked at all the comments on the site. (Yes, I have an assistant) Here are the winners:
Congrats to the winners and keep on commenting!
On to some world news. So if you guys weren’t aware 2 Asian American journalists were caught in the border of North Korea and China a few months back. They were tried in North Korea and sentenced to 12 years of Labor Camp/Gulag in North Korea.
Well after tons of vigils and lots of press finally started working. I woke up today to see that our favorite fornicating president, Bill Clinton went to North Korea and had some negotiations going. I guess he charmed the socks outta North Korea because apparently North Korean leader and my doppelgänger Kim Jong Il agreed to pardon the 2 journalists. That is awesome. Nothing is final until the 2 women set foot on american soil but this is a great start. Yay!
Finally on a personal note, go purchase my dvd!
Thanks!
Its the beginning of August so pretty soon I will announce the winners of the best comments of the posts for the month of July. My team (my assistant) and I will be re-reading the comments on the website and pick the best comments. So stay tuned for that!
Now, for those that don’t know, there is a website that basically is getting a lot of heat because it allows users to upload a “roast”. There is a lot of haterade going on, especially on the internet. I was wondering when my fat mug would make it on the site because I know there are tons of people that hate me. Well last week, someone put my mug on there:
I am all for freedom of speech. I am glad that it wasn’t anything crazy. Some of the roasts are pretty fucked up. Not because I know a lot of the people being roasted but rather some of them are downright fucked up. And if I think something is fucked up then it must be truly terrible. I saw one post where this dude posted pics of his ex girl sucking his dick, cumshot included. Although, I think its stupid for chicks to let themselves get photographed while they are doing the genital tango. Especially, when they dont want that shit leaked out for the world to see. I think it should be common courtesy for a dude to not release shit like that. Now if the chick was a porn star, I might let it slide because her vagina is out in the open all the time.
Anyways, there are other posts that might affect peoples lives and that shouldnt be the case. The internet is one scary motherfucker. I will say this though, the site is mad addicting to read through. So if you have time to kill at work check out www.roastlist.com.
Next I was asked to MC a wedding. Normally, I don’t do this type of gig because I dont have much wedding material and I don’t like the idea that I might be able to ruin a wedding day because of my crassness. But the wedding was for my buddy Lazy Swayze and Sarah.
Even though I shit on people all the time, I would like to say congrats guys! The wedding was damn beautiful. It also helps that lots of the guests were buddies.
MVP of the night had to be Sarah’s Mom. She was rocking out on the dance floor all night long. You haven’t lived until you see a middle aged Korean lady in a hanbok rocking out to Soulja Boy! True story!
One More thing! Check out my buddy Big Phony!
That is all for now. I am going to bed its been a hell of a week.
Go get my dvd! I need to eat this week! Thanks!
My buddy, Patty Yu, asked me to be in a parody music video that she wanted to do. I said sure why not… It is a parody of Boa’s I’ll Eat U Up. 
Here is Patty’s version: 
You can see my cameo there. It was a fun shoot! Leave comments and show love to my girl patty!
Sometimes I get caught up with all of life’s stupidity that I lose focus of my loved ones. The ones I tend to forget and neglect the most are my family. But recently I rewatched this video:
It put me in a weird mood. A part of me was truly moved by such unconditional love. A love that only parents have for their children. I have caused quite a few heartaches for my mom and dad. The most recent one being my transition to becoming a fulltime comedian and actor. They weren’t so happy about my move. For those that don’t know, I used to work as a Valuation Consultant at KPMG. I made pretty decent money and really didn’t stress about bills etc. I actually learned a lot and enjoyed my time there. However, at the same time, I started getting more gigs in the entertainment business. From stand up to my stuff at Mad TV and some commercials. It just made it impossible for me to continue doing both the consulting gig and the entertainment stuff.
I decided that I need to scratch this itch and quit my good paying job and instantly dropped a few levels in the income bracket. The first month after quitting, I made $65!!!
My parents were obviously not happy with the move. You see they came to this country and worked their asses off (they still do) to make sure that my sister and I wouldnt have to struggle like them. They sacrifice everything for my sister and me. That is why even though it is a bit sad that they dont approve in what I do, I understand that it is because they want what is best for me in their eyes.
And even though they dont like what I do, my parents at this point still try to be as supportive as they can. That is unconditional love right there. Even though, I am a fuck up at times, they are still right there for me. For that I am eternally grateful.
My dad is 6’1 and my mom is 4’8. Add that up and divide it by 2, you get my height.
Message to Parents:
I know that you come to this site sometimes and don’t know what I am writing. I wanted to say THANK YOU for being who you are. Sure we have our disagreements and you disapprove of a lot of things about me. Seeing you work so hard even til this day really inspires me. APPA, you taught me to never give up. As you liked to say ” When a man draws his sword, he should always draw blood.” I struggle with it but I try emulate your work ethic. Umma, I am sorry for not being a better son. You always told me that when Halmoni died you wished you were a better daughter to her. I know I dont show it but I always think of you guys as much as possible.
To My Sister:
Grace, I doubt you will read this but I wanted to say Sorry for not being a better older brother to you. I know it must have been tough to be my little sister. The pressure, the expectations. I am proud of the adult you have become and I will try to be there more.
Message to my Readers:
Take care of your loved ones. Family is all you got sometimes.
I am the first to admit that I am not fashionable at all. Facebook has an application where you rank your “friends” in certain categories and I was voted least fashionable and least trustworthy. Thanks Assholes!
Anyways, I have been noticing some things that people wear that irk the living hell out of me.
I really do need a stylist
1) Ed Hardy Hats and Shirts
Let me give you a little history lesson about how this brand came about. So one day this trucker hat wearing douchebag started ingesting some shrooms. He then reached for some skittles because he was hungry. As he is looking the plethora of colors, he realized that if he puts the skittles on his Von Dutch Hat then, throw on some buttons and maybe some glitter it would be cool. Then the d-bag decided to charge $80 per hat.
Item contains Buttons, Glitter, Skittles, and Unicorn Tears.
He then targeted 2 very affluent communities (The Persians and Korean Fobs).
Guess what? If you go to Ktown you will see at least 10 Ed Hardy hats. And I guaruntee you 8 of the 10 people wearing those hats are fobs. I don’t have a problem with persians or Korean fobs. I have a huge problem with those hats though.
Then they decided to to make shirts, jackets, shoes, etc. So now not only do I see hideous hats around. I see people decked in this shit from head to toe. It looks like a rainbow got raped. Word of advice to the people that wear this shit. Pick 2-3 colors and stick with it. Nothing Bedazzled either. You guys are so colorful I can see you from google maps. Its really bad.
2) Sunglasses at Night
Unless you are Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder, or Jack Nicholson, you are not allowed to wear glasses at night. Actually, anyone with creepy lazy eyes can wear them at night. That is why Musiq Soulchild wears sunglasses all the time. He got a crazy eyes. Trust me…
Anyways, don’t wear glasses at night. If you do decide to wear sunglasses at night you better be performing on stage or it better be a costume. If not please go run into a tree.
There are a lot more things that bug me about fashion but I forgot to bring my laptop charger.
I have a show coming up in a couple of weeks so come thru!
Oh and a reminder, the end of the month is coming up soon! Free DVD’s will be given away so leave them comments putos!
